Assalamualaikum and hi ! Zaty rose is doing fine ! Dah lama kan zaty tak update entri? I am not that busy pun but you know I just need some spaces. 

   It's windy here in Penang. Windy and rainy. This January is colder than December, trust me hahahaha. It's a perfect weather for me to contemplate life! It's comfy and bubbly. I love it. 

   I am actually struggling with ED (eating disorder). Sometimes I just can't stop eating and sometimes I don't wanna eat at all. Everytimes, I will just keep on staring at the mirror and hoping that my body will be perfect. Sometimes, I just cry hoping things will change. It's suck! I though I will get better but it's actually just keep getting bad. I don't know when will it ends but I hope it will. 

   I am actually not in a good mental state, I am trying so hard right now to redesign my brain but I don't know how and when to start! My screentimes are getting high and I hate that! I stopped writing, I stopped reading. Just rot in bed and staring at the ceiling. Wondering... 

   Maybe it's the effect of the ED. I just lose interest in doing something when I remember (iykyk). 

   But I don't want to waste my youth just by giving spaces for my bad mental state to take over me. I need to fight back right? I got to just wake up and be like.. yuh try me! I can do it! I know I can! 

   I keep on thinking it's never too late to start again. It's never too late to enjoy and live life. So, I'll try my best for that! It's just a bad day, not a bad life. It's just a phase! It will pass! 

   So, yuh! That's it! I will redesign my brain! Fulfilling my motives and wishes. Let's do it! We lost sometimes and it's fine. Welcome back, dearself! 

   And before i close my entry for today, just wanna let you know that it's a global strike weeks for Palestine! Keep on resisting! The global strikes start from 21-28 January! We got this! I talk about Palestine more in my twitter, btw! No matter how small you account are, keep on speaking up because your voices matter! Every single of you! 

  It's never too late to speak up either. Your silences are being noticed! Speak up! 

   That's it for today. Until the next entry. See you when i see you! Love you to the moon and jupiter! Aur revoir!! 

Labels: #FreePalestine, mental health